1.12.2010

Is scared the right word?

This past Saturday some dear friends threw me a baby shower. I had a great time and really enjoyed seeing my friends and of course the gifts were awesome! I felt blessed to have so many people share in this special time.

Now, the thank you notes have been written and B and I went through all the goodies to organize C's room. To be perfectly honest, I'm a little worried. Not about the delivery, rather what comes next...caring for our little guy. I guess you could say that I'm an instructions and lists sort of girl, as long as I've got something to reference I feel I can do a "job" adequately. Well, I've read and am in the middle of reading books on babies but I still have feelings of apprehension. I've got more questions than I do answers and I'm not going to lie, I'm scared.

I've got all these great things, but with some of them, I have no idea when to introduce them to our baby or even how to use them. I don't know if sterilizing a bottle or pacifier means running them through the dish washer or if I need to boil them (and if so for how long?). Should I leave the bumpers on the crib or should I remove them? How do I know what toys to give him? And what about pumping, when do I start doing that? I'm an only child so I have never really spent much time with infants or babies and the time I have spent with the moms has been maybe a couple hours. I feel like I'm going into this HUGE job of being a mommy completely blind; like I should have been shadowing and "expert" before I get handed the little guy who's been living and growing inside me all these months and who will be completely dependent on me.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I have been around a ton of babies - being so much older than my 6 siblings - and it still freaks me out! I have complete confidence that you will be an amazing mommy to little Conner though!!

Stephanie. said...

No one knows how to take care of an infant better than their own mother. As your friends, we can offer you all the advice you can handle, but only YOU will know what to do. In the tough times (and there will be some), go ahead and ask questions and reference books, but know that whatever you choose to do will be the RIGHT thing and Conner is so very lucky to have you as his mommy. Love goes a long way and we all know you have enough of that in your heart, so hold your head high and take a deep breath because you WILL be amazing at this new mommy gig. There are no doubts about that!
(())hugs to you!(())

Mary said...

You would be weird if you didn't feel scared. Every new mom feels that way, no matter how many books she's read, classes she's taken, or people she's talked to. There's no cure for it except bringing that baby home and just taking things as they come. You'll be fine Michelle. You'll have some frantic moments, as every new parent does. But you'll figure it out. It's all trial and error anyway. Nobody really knows what to do. Every baby is so different. There isn't a right or wrong. But there are lots of opinions, as you'll find out. The only one that matters though, is yours. You'll get more comfortable with that in time. Just know that the first 6 weeks are hard for EVERYBODY. So cut yourself plenty of slack in the beginning and keep in mind that it gets easier and more fun. Before you know it, and without even realizing it's happening, you'll suddenly find yourself confident, comfortable, and at home with your new role. You're going to be a great mom.

Jill said...

Take a deep breath. You and Conner will be fine. The only thing that is right for Conner is what you choose to be right for him. We can give you all the advice in the world, but really the only opinion that counts is yours and B's. Shoot I have had two and still don't know what to do with them half the time. I am always googling something about how to handle this or that. Remember no one is perfect and Conner will love you anyways :)
Boil the bottles and pacifiers in hot water for about 5 minutes I think once you take them out of the package. After that you can wash them on the top rack of the dishwasher, or hand wash or boil again. Up to you. I think most everything comes with directions now.
Remember you can call me any hour of the night. And if he gets a fever of more than 100 rectally (oh yeah try getting a squirmy baby to let you do that) then call the doctor.
xoxox you will be a wonderful mother!